Got the best e-mail auto-reply at work today

Got the best e-mail auto-reply at work today
Got the best e-mail auto-reply at work today

And you printed it?

And then took a picture of it...

And then edited out the personal information

Had similar auto reply in one of my previous work places. Was warned by a manager that it's "unprofessional" and it wasn't a nice conversation. So when it was the next time I went on vacation, I kept the reply, but added a rule in Outlook to exclude that manager when the auto reply is on.


Know what's "unprofessional?" Doing shitty work. Anything else is just personality and style and people need to calm down about it.

Holy shit! This guy is taking Roy off the grid!! He doesn't have a social security number for Roy!!!

This guy is in his 50s or 60s. I can tell because he used the /roy at the end. The only people that do slash initials started in IT in the 80s.

What he forgot to mention was that his job title was "Internal Email Formality Maintenance Manager."

He didn't include the most helpful thing to write in those emails: whom to contact in his absence.

It's great he's on vacation, but I will absolutely hate him if I'm outside his organization and have an urgent request/question.

Not Roy. He has no access to Outlook nor a printer. Unless the shark ate a printer before he ate Roy, but I think he’d be too busy to print an email while he’s being digested.

I know you won't read it but fuck you /roy and your happy shark vacation. The rest of us are here working our JOBS you smug shit.

And looking at reddit. Working AND looking at reddit.

You went back to the carpet store??

eh could be in his 30s and used IRC as a youth

Who prints email?

Print, take photo, take screenshot of photo, hand draw replica, scan, take photo of scan

How else do you suggest he take that online communication and present it to the internet?

Jokes like this are so dumb but always make me laugh. Like the Stewart Lee one with similar structure:

"My grandad used to say, Stew, you can't judge a book by its cover.

And that's why later that year he lost his job as head judge of the British Book Cover awards"

/me slaps chrimewave with a large trout.

This is peak dumb office "humor"

No, no, not Luke Skywalker and Jimi Hendrix

fucking shoot me in the face.

Ah, Roy made one huge mistake.

At the end of your OoO message, you need to put. If this matter is urgent and requires a reply, please resend the email on {date of return}.

That way, you don't have to answer any email you don't feel like answering. It works wonders...and basically let's just just mark all your email as read with no worries.

I fucking hate people who don't leave a contact in their out of office messages but even worse than that are people who leave a contact that only their own depart can get in contact with.

"Please contact Allan while I'm away."

Mother fucker we don't work for the same company, I don't know Allan, you didn't leave a phone number or email address, and not even a last name so I can try to plug it into your company's standard email address format.

This is the kind of person who thinks they are a lot funnier than they really are.

This is wildly self obsessed

This guy is taking Roy off the grid!

I mean, that's a little glib. I would say doing great work then exposing yourself your secretary would be unprofessional.

Had OP taken a screenshot to post it here, OP would have broken rule 1A.

Must not get too many emails at your work or OP's work. No one would do this where I would work as everyone would be super pissed, "I don't have time to read this right now, just tell me where I need to go to move this forward if you're OOO".

This is roughly how emails and documents are forwarded at my office.

this type of personality wouldn't be a fit in my office. third parties emailing in aren't trying to see this. "I'm out of office until December 11th" is enough -- people don't want to read 250 words of nonsense every time someone is out of office.

If I got an autoreply like that I would roll my eyes so hard and then continue avoiding this dumbass at work functions

No joke: My mother in law files incoming bills and such for an office. She gets them in email, prints them, and then scans them to PDF to file them in their system. My wife showed her that she can print to PDF, but then she complained that the resulting PDF was like 100k instead of the 40k when scanned in 1-bit B&W.

Apparently she prefers small file size that looks like garbage over a quickly created and searchable file.

We're all out of off-white Persian...

I think he was trying a bit too hard

I cringed.

hi every1 im away!!!!!!! holds up spork my name is roy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol…as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i go to the island, 2 meet random ppl like me _… im 45 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch death metal shows w/ my wife and son (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite music!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! my wife is random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!!

DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again _^ hehe…toodles!!!!!

love and waffles,


Omg so quirky

Calm down, man. If you don't know Allan's last name, all you have to do ask Sara, she knows.

Shut the fuck up Roy.

Huh, TIL

Christ what an asshole

Wow. That's a phrase I haven't seen in many, many years.

I stopped caring by the middle of the second sentence.

actually this whole autoreply is mad annoying. just let me know when you'll be back, i could give two shits about your vacation

Agreed. You don't have to be a humorless Grinch to not find any of this funny. Shakespeare said it best: "Brevity is the soul of wit," not "rambling quirky monologues are the soul of wit"

HAHAHA IM DYING 😂😂😂 you’re hilarious - man I feel so old but I just felt like it was worth a print

Dude what the fuck lmao

I'm sorry to tell you this but you're actually 59.

This guy thinks he's really funny.


....How am I precluding people from being happy and silly? I'm just some idiot on an internet board.

Just let people not like stuff.

I used to do work with an older dude who would have his secretary print all his emails, he’d hand write a reply, then fax them back to me.

To this day I’m still not sure if it was epic passive aggression or he just really didn’t know how to use emails.

He doesn't have an outlook app for his phone!

Exactly, why would anyone who wants to contact slash-roy on his work email care about any of this. I bet slash-roy is the kind of person who has to explain why their 'jokes' are funny.

It's also a terribly unhelpful out of office message. Not only does it need a tl;dr to cut through this dude's 'personality,' but slash-roy made no mention of whom to contact in their absence.

Same. If I saw that auto reply, I'd be annoyed. No mention of who to contact if I need to reach them/that team.

Listen you and I both know I'm looking at reddit and I wish I could say working but there's none of that getting done.

Allan please add contact details

happy meal

It was all one big dad joke

Dude, don't listen to these people. You print what you want. Thank you for sharing.

You can set different OoOs for external parties. Hell, you can set rules for anything.

Hoooooly shit you've just changed my life.

I've seen it before that, actually. I always thought it started in the 60's-70's, personally, as a remnant of the old printed memo usage.

JR:tc or JR/tc to show that the someone else typed the memo.

Holy shit! This guy is taking Roy off the grid!! He doesn't have a social security number outlook inbox for Roy!!!

I had a client that, after I emailed him some images, he wanted me to print those pictures for him, so he could take them home and scan them and email them to someone from the scanner.

That’s... not how any of this works.

My old boss would've terminated this guy because his auto-response is "too unprofessional". Like God forbid we bring some levity into selling finger stock gaskets.

This made my day.

I’m married to an off-white Persian.


This would piss me off if I got this response. I’m happy you’re taking time off, but no need to be smug and rub it in. A simple “I’m out of the office x/x - x/x” would have been enough.

JR/tc to show that the someone else typed the memo.

this is still used in professional offices to show the partner who's signing off on the memo and the staff or administrator who wrote it

OoO is like spider eyes staring at me. Why'd you do this to me?

Reading this email, it sounds like this guy doesn't do any actual work.

Using the pen/brush tool instead of rectangles

I could tell them from the fact he had enough money to raise a family AND take a tropical vacation during peak tropical vacation season.

Roy's humor may or may not be someone's cup of tea, but he's a positive person. I'd prefer to be surrounded by Roys than people who are toxic and negative all the time.

Old people make me so irrationally angry when it comes to technology. Like the Japanese National cyber security guy who doesn't know what a USB is. Or Julianni (sp) running shit for Trump. I can just imagine them typing with their index fingers and wondering why their Internet Explorer w/ 20 toolbars is running so slowly. These are the people running million dollar companies and trying to fax confidential information. This is why Itunes giftcard scams work...

I passive aggressively print emails for my idiot night shift coworker. He won’t read emails sent to him during the day about shit that needs done at night so I print them out and put them on his keyboard. He still doesn’t do shit but it covers my ass and makes him look even stupider to our boss

Really? Damn, I gotta stop watching so much porn.

It is most of the time harmless I agree but still corporations don't want to take risks, especially not in relationships between supplier and customer ( if it is internal then I think in 95% cases, there should not be a problem - unless CEO is writing to VP as you have mentioned )

I can imagine few scenarios where customer would be pissed off that you have spend time to write this but not include who is your deputy in the meantime ( in period of big crisis going on for example ).

I know this is in very specific case but as I have mentioned.. Corporations don't want to take risks so wishing nice Christmas currently is enough.

Yeah internally this is fine I guess but even then if someone needs to contact me they'd not wanna have to read all this shit.

Someone isn't getting their invoice paid

He's either the top of the food chain and you'd know to reach out to a VP or a lateral colleague. Or he's bottom of the food chain and the person you ask is sitting next to your cube.

My money's on B.

43 . Do it all the time.

This level of "over it" bullshit is exhausting. Just ... let people be happy and silly you cranky old bastard.

Yeah I thought this was lame, unprofessional and annoying. I wouldn't want him to suffer any consequences or anything but thanks.

Not because of Jimi Hendrix and Luke Skywalker?

I've worked IT for several multi-billion dollar companies and consistently the level of ability to use and understand technology decreases the higher you go up the food chain, and it gets worse the higher that top is. By the time you get to the board of a major corporation half of them can't even check their own email and still have their assistants print it out for them.

This probably doesn't apply in tech companies, but it is incredibly prevalent in industries that use tech rather than creating it. My personal experiences are in aerospace, finance, and real estate IT departments.

Yikes. Sounds like you need to go wherever roy is and try to take life a little less seriously.

They don't have to.. It shows you its an automatic reply. You read it once, or not at all and just skim for thr date they will return.

what an attention starved asshole

No joke we hired a project manager at my work (3D designers, all electronic files, nothing physical) who I swear to god was printing every god damm file on our server one page at a fucking time and for each page would stand up, walk by my desk, pick up the page, walk back past my desk, file the the goddam page in his filing cabinet and then print the next one. If he hadn’t gotten fired when he did I think I would have had to kill him. There’s no other choice.

On the contrary, perhaps this person is/was a secretary and is used to typing letters for other people. The notation is:


Where AB is the person who sent the letter and cd is the typist.

who names their kid slashroy

Be like boy!!!

you can't </roy> if you never <roy>ed prior to that.

yeah but he referenced pop culture, just like me and my friends!

How grating. I don't even know this guy and I want to stuff a sock in his mouth.

People are giving you crap but, I kinda agree, it's a little more cringe-worthy than funny. I mean, the intent is cute, and I wouldn't stay up at night shaking my head over it, but I read this and I'm like... k. Should be a 2 sentence joke, the joke is not 3-paragraph-worthy, let's move this along Roy-boy, lol.

Allan never existed. But you trying to find him will keep you busy until he gets back.

I like this, it feels human and in this day and age it's a rare thing. I hope more people become like Roy. Unless Roy is a bot doing a good job of pretending to be a human.

I'm inspired. I will be drafting my work email auto-reply soon. :-)

Me too, it really made my day 😅